Chad Picasner at Large: 2018

Saturday, December 29, 2018

LET'S GO BOWLING

Football junkies have to be ecstatic. There are 39 bowl games plus the Football Playoff National Championship game. There are 78 teams who will participate in this year's bowls all over the country, including Hawaii (what, no Alaska?). All the good names were taken many, many years ago, so they have to come up with new ones. Every year I think we've scrapped the bottom of the barrel and every year I discover that the barrel is bottomless, so let's see what we have this year.

Would You Be Embarrassed Bowls
Gasparilla Bowl - This bowl was named after the legendary pirate Jose Gaspar. How nice - except for the fact that he never existed.
Cheez-It Bowl - Is this a game for criminals who have successfully avoided the police? This could lead to a conversation like this: "I'm in a Bowl Game this year." "Yeah? Which one" "The Cheez-It Bowl." "No really, which one?"
The Famous Idaho Potato Bowl - It's famous only in Idaho and takes place in Boise, ID, as you might expect.
Dollar General Bowl - I haven't been able to find out what the tickets cost, but I'm guessing you won't need any discounts.
Camping World Bowl - The game will be great but the player accommodations involve tent stakes. It's okay though, the game is in Orlando, Florida.

Didn't have a very good year? No problem, here's a couple of bowls made to order:

Cure Bowl - Tulane (6-6) plays Louisiana-Lafayette (7-6). And the name fits, too
Texas Bowl - Baylor (6-6) and Vanderbilt (6-6)

Need Help Getting Into a Bowl? No problem, just use the old home-town method.
New Mexico Bowl - Utah State vs (you guessed it) New Mexico ***
Hawaii Bowl - Louisiana Tech vs Hawaii
Armed Forces Bowl - Houston vs Army

Are You Hungry Bowls
The Citrus Bowl
The Peach Bowl
The Sugar Bowl
The Orange Bowl
Don't forget Cheez-it and Idaho Potato

Shameless Bowls
There are 12 bowls with the corporate sponsors name right up front. Some are listed above and then there are:
Camellia, Belk, Quick Lane, Redbox, Outback, Alamo and Music City bowls.

Unlike in the past, there are no teams with losing records this year, but there are 10 teams with 6-6 records. The four teams vying for the championship certainly appear to belong there:
#2 Clemson (13-0)
#3 Notre Dame (12-0)
#4 Oklahoma (12-1)
#1 Alabama (13-0)

Last night, an FCS playoff semifinal was on TV. North Dakota State vs South Dakota State. Believe it or not, the game was played in Fargo, North Dakota. Oh yeah, North Dakota St. won 44-21.

See, this is why we need football analysts. At the start of the Army-Navy game, analysts Gary Danielson gave us an insight into the game: "The formula for Army: no negative plays, no turnovers and no penalties.” Who knew?

***THEY SAID IT***

"The Mariners’ Jerry Dipoto, despite coming down seriously ill during the Baseball Winter Meetings in Las Vegas, nonetheless pulled off a three-team swap from his hospital bed. It’s believed to be the first deal in MLB history that’s contingent on a GM passing his physical." -- Dwight Perry

"Connor McDavid has two straight scoring titles, is currently in the top five, but hasn’t made the NHL playoffs and his Oilers sit 22nd in goals. Dolly Parton has less trouble finding support." -- RJ Currie
" The Thursday Night Football referees were so bad they've just been hired by the Big Ten." -- Brad Dickson
" First five College Football Bowl games start on December 15. And if you can name more than one of them, you just might need a life." -- Janice Hough
"As for the Yankees, will they offer Manny Machado X millions of dollars more if he occasionally plays as if he gives a rat’s retina? Will there be a running-to-first bonus? So buy your tickets now! Come on out and watch them quit!" -- Phil Mushnick
"Green Bay parted ways with coach Mike McCarthy. Or should we say they sent him Packing?" -- RJ Currie
" Free agent reliever Adam Ottavino says he would “strike out Babe Ruth every time.” Mostly because the Bambino has now been dead for 70 years." -- Jim Barach
"As we get to mid-December, casual basketball fans can rejoice in the fact that we are only about six months away from NBA finals." -- Janice Hough
"Best seats for next season’s Yankees – Red Sox games in London will set you back $500 each. That would only get you parking, program, hot dog and a beer at Yankee Stadium. (or 2 standing room only tickets on Fenway’s Green Monster)" -- TC Chong

"The NFL has decided to hold the 2020 draft in Las Vegas. What could go wrong?" -- Brad Dickson

"Delta announced it will drop zone boarding on its flights, starting in 2019. Jim Boeheim, we hear, is inconsolable." -- Dwight Perry

CP-

*** It appears that I've been a victim of poor information. The New Mexico bowl does NOT feature New Mexico but North Texas. I hope the right team shows up for the game. Sorry about the mistake [C Picasner - 4:30 pm]

Friday, December 21, 2018

SHORT AND SWEET

Maybe not too sweet if you happen to be a Yankee/Machado fan. Two NY sports writers have written about the possible final resting place for Machado and they both handicap it this way:

1) The Phillies
2) The White Sox
3) The Yankees

They reason that the Phillies are anxious to spend big to get either Machado, Harper or both. Philly and the White Sox both seem more than willing to go for 10 years at $30 million each that he's seeking. The consensus seems to be that NY will probably offer 7 years at $30 million. Machado has indicated that he wants to play for the Yankees, but historically, he will follow the money like every other free agent has. We've seen this many times in the past. Robinson (I wanna remain a Yankee) Cano being dragged to the west coast by the dollars, Patrick Corbin to Washington in spite of being from Syracuse and having his whole family pushing him to NY. Remember A-Rod, who took big, big money from the Rangers after he "researched the team in depth so he play for a winner" and became disillusioned after a couple of years of losing.

Finally, Machado met with the Yanks for a 90 minute meeting and dinner that night on Wednesday, then met with the Phillies for four hours on Thursday. That's got to tell you something.

Machado may drag this out a little bit to try and force teams to bid against each other, so we probably won't hear the answer until after Christmas.

Picasner's suggestion for NY: Sign Tulowitzki and nail down Harper. He fits the team better. Trade Clint Frazier and Ellsbury (Have to eat some money on that one). Gardner becomes the backup outfielder and Stanton becomes the DH. How's this for a NY lineup:
Hicks, CF
Judge, RF
Harper, LF
Stanton, DH
Sanchez, C
Andujar, 3B
Voit/Bird, 1B
Tulowitzki, SS
Torres, 2B
That lineup should be good for 300 home runs and 1000 runs and probably 100+ wins, barring injuries. I'll take that.

It's not sports, but...
"After reading that “Long Island Medium” Theresa Caputo has finalized her divorce,
reader Eric H. asks whether she saw it coming." Phil Mushnick's column

***THEY SAID IT***
"The world’s oldest woman, Jeanne Calment, who lived to be 122, credited long life to port wine, olive oil and “lots of smiling.” Good news, Bill Belichick, you can buy the first two." -- RJ Currie
"Ohio State coach Urban Meyer, after he retires, again for health reason, will co-teach a course at the school on character and leadership. Some statements don’t even need a punchline." -- Janice Hough
"Goodbye to Penny Marshall and thanks to her for reminding us that “there’s no crying in baseball”. (yankee fans exempt) She truly was “Big” and “In a League of Her Own”. -- TC Chong

"Adam Ottavino, a 33-year-old journeyman pitcher, claimed on an MLB Statcast podcast. “‘Babe Ruth, with that swing, swinging that bat, I got him hitting .140 with eight homers. … I would strike Babe Ruth out every time.’ ” In Babe’s defense, though, hitting .140 with eight homers in today’s game would be a pretty good showing for a 123-year-old." -- Dwight Perry

"The Warriors’ Steph Curry said he has doubts about the lunar landing, then later said he was just kidding. Steph, there’s been more walking on the moon than what’s called in the NBA." -- Gary Bachman
"A rumour says the Dodgers’ Manny Machado will sign with the Phillies. With an expected
contract offer of $300 million, he will show what hustle is in how fast he gets to the signing table.”
-- Jim Barach
"The World Series trophy was damaged by a thrown full can of beer during the Red Sox championship parade. That’s terrible. Talk about a waste of beer!” -- Greg Cote

CP-

Saturday, December 15, 2018

LETS GO BOWL-ING

"Delta announced it will drop zone boarding on its flights, starting in 2019. Jim Boeheim, we hear, is inconsolable." -- Dwight Perry

CP-

Monday, December 10, 2018

THE SILLY SEASON CONVENTION

Also known as the Baseball Winter Meetings.

It's in Las Vegas this year which will give the General Managers something to do. It used to be they all met to discuss rule changes and make trades, but because everything is money these days, nobody makes a move without checking with the owners and the geeks in the front office. Why?
1) The players agents' ask for astronomical money
2) All rule changes must be geared toward getting more fans (money) into the stadiums
3) Trades are determined by the saber metrics, not statistics
4) Most owners are megalomaniacs (Actually, this one probably supersedes the first three)

In the past, it could have been called uber-agent Scott Boras' house party. He didn't walk around the hotel, he was carried by GMs carrying him in a litter that would have been envied by Egyptian pharaohs. These days, it's not so much about the annual salaries as the extreme lengths of the contracts. 10-year deals are not out of the ordinary now. Multiply the yearly figure by the number of years and you get numbers that are mind-boggling. Bryce Harper is reportedly looking for 10 years at $40 million per. That's $400 million dollars people. Manny Machado is looking for $300 million. Imagine that? $30 million a year to jog to first base.

In spite of these numbers, the Scott Boras theory (TODO) is still in effect - The One Dumb Owner. This year, the prime candidate is John Middleton and his son, John Jr. of the Philadelphia Phillies. He's already stated that he's willing to spend "stupid money," a phrase that has Boras salivating worse than Pavlov's dogs.

The Baseball Hall of Fame Veterans committee has elected two players into the hall this week. Harold Baines and Lee Smith. Again, my standards for election are much higher than the people who actually get a vote. I believe the Hall should be reserved for great or outstanding players and not just very-good players. Smith is certainly a deserving choice but not Baines. He may have been very popular but his numbers are very good but not outstanding. David Schoenfield, an ESPN Senior Writer, had this to say about Baines: "A nice player, good enough to make some All-Star teams, but not a great player, not in the way you think of Hall of Famers." The 35 players on the ballot in January for the BBWAA regular selection contain only four players worthy of consideration.
Mariano Rivera - a shoo-in
Mike Mussina - somewhat marginal but he should make it.
Edgar Martinez - his numbers aren't quite good enough
Curt Schilling - good, but his numbers aren't even as good as Mussina's
I don't count Barry Bonds or Roger Clemens, since the stigma of PEDs are paramount in their consideration. Maybe this shouldn't count, but for some reason, these two seem to bear the burden of guilt. Both have captured a little more than 50% of the vote last time. We'll have to wait to see if this continues.

Soon, I will comment on this years College Football Bowl Games.

Congratulations to Dwight Perry of the Seattle Times and author of Sideline Chatter, a wry look at sports. He has just completed his 19th year and I've enjoyed his humor for at least 10 of those years.

***THEY SAID IT***
"Long-time Bears fan Danica Patrick says she is a Packers fan now that she's dating QB Aaron Rodgers. Oh well, after all her years with NASCAR, she's used to trailing the competition." -- RJ Currie
"Colin Kaepernick reportedly would consider a tryout with the Washington Redskins. So the former Super Bowl QB is willing to compromise on his stated desire to play for an NFL team?" -- Janice Hough
" Dec. 1’s St. John’s-Georgia Tech “Miami Invitational” in 20,000-seat American Airlines Arena,
officially reported 5,749 in the house. Thus, as seen — or not seen — on ESPNU, at least 5,000 were hiding." -- Phil Mushnick
"Clippers guard Patrick Beverley got ejected and fined $25,000 for throwing a bounce pass at a courtside fan who heckled him in Dallas. Flummoxed statisticians were hopelessly torn: assist or turnover?" -- Dwight Perry
" Yahoo! Sports reports Wizards centre Dwight Howard needs surgery for a lingering gluteal injury. Ironic for a guy widely considered by so many teammates as a pain in the ass." -- RJ Currie
"’ll say this about Robinson Cano: He did seem more excited to be a Met than Carlos Beltran, who practically showed up for his introductory Mets press conference wearing a Yankees cap." -- Mike Vaccaro, NY Post
"MLB commissioner Rob Manfred wants to do something next year to limit shifts. Uh, here’s a solution – teach players to bunt." -- Janice Hough
"Kyler Murray won the Heisman which I attribute mostly to the difficulty of spelling "Tua Tagovailoa" -- Brad Dickson

"(Harold Baines made the HOF, George Steinbrenner didn't) "In what universe did Baines impact Major League Baseball more than The Boss?" -- Ken Davidoff, NY Post
"Derek Fisher says moving to the WNBA was not a step down. Which is actually true considering his last job before that was coaching the Knicks" -- Jim Barach (jokesbyjim.blogspot.com)

CP-

Thursday, November 29, 2018

THE SILLY SEASON IS BACK...AND SO IS CHAD

** I watched the Syracuse-Ohio State game last night and saw that the Orange finally decided to play without a lid on the basket, shooting about 50% from the field, including 3-pointers. Their defense, always tough, is getting better every game. I noticed that Buddy Boeheim, the coaches son, never made an appearance. Buddy came to the Orange billed as a sharpshooter, deadly from 3-point land. That description is close. His shooting eye IS dead. His field goal percentage is an anemic 10.3%.
Another observation: the officials were horrible. They missed some obvious fouls, called non-existent violations and the ones they did call were ticky-tack fouls. I think Sidibe was called once for heavy breathing in the lane. Coaches often resort to a zone defense to protect their players when they're in foul trouble. Syracuse always plays zone yet they were called for 28 fouls as opposed to Ohio St.'s 17.
Speaking of Sidibe, the announcers gave him at least 3 different pronunciations. Dolezaj had 4. Their preparedness left an awful lot to be desired.

** We are at the start of what I like to call The Silly Season, when rumors fly and and agents salivate. Like last year, there will be a number of players who will be left without offers and even more who will be forced to sign for a lot less money than their agents promised them. There are two big names out there - Machado and Harper, both looking for 10 year deals in the neighborhood of $300 - $400 million. Naturally, when you talk about this kind of money, the Yankees are always rumored to be in the mix. The New York sports writers post article after article speculating on things the Yanks could or should do. One writer suggests that the Yanks should sign them both. Sure, like Hal Steinbrenner has a spare $700 million in his other pants. If they should do that, imagine what the Yankee defense would look like: five outfielders and five infielders and a lot of no-hitters.
Only problem with these two guys is they both come with baggage. Harper is very volatile and tends to let up when he's angry and Machado is even worse. A Washington National teammate actually attacked Harper in the dugout after he gave something less than a full effort on a ground ball. If he did that with NY, Gardner would go after him with a bat. Machado has been trying desperately to back off of his "I'm no Johnny-Hustle" remark after the World Series. That will play well too.
Now there's a rumor that the Yanks are looking to get Robinson Cano back from the Mariners. Oh yeah, That would make three guys walking to first base every night.
Finally, a sad goodbye to "The Toe," Ronald Torreyes, the most popular guy on the team. He was traded to the Cubs for something to be named later. a player, money or used equipment. Little Torreyes, listed at 5'8" (He isn't. 5'5" is more like it) is famous for his high fives in the dugout with 6'7" Aaron Judge. A scrappy player, he never let you down when he played.

Curtis Granderson has been named as MLBPA's Marvin Miller Man of the Year award for the third time. The award is given annually to a player for his contributions to the community as well as on-field performance. He is the first three time winner. For someone who is universally recognized as one of the finest gentleman in the game and very productive, I don't understand why he has played for six different teams in his 15 year career. I guess that's just baseball.

Syracuse vs.Colgate 77-56. Apparently is was the toothpaste not the college.

***THEY SAID IT***
"According to research published in Current Biology, people burn the most calories in the afternoon.
Oh, yeah? Ever see the Oakland Raiders play at 1 p.m. on Sundays?" -- Dwight Perry
" John Daly told the Charlotte Observer he played better golf back when he was a drunk. Presumably in those days he used a putter, a wedge and a designated driver." -- RJ Currie
"In the Panther’s 52-21 loss to the Steelers, Carolina’s Kyle Love fell asleep on the sideline. Love will be fined $5,000 and charged with impersonating a Cleveland Brown.” -- Alex Kaseberg
"Kansas has hired ex-LSU football coach Les Miles. He has the luxury of going from a place where the expectation is ‘Beat Alabama’ to a place where the expectation is ‘Beat Anyone.’ ” -- Pat Forde, Yahoo Sports
"What do you call a game between state rivals Mississippi and Ole Miss that ends in a lopsided 35-3 score? A Miss-match" -- RJ Currie {RJ is currently locked in a battle with Dwight Perry for the title of King of the Puns - CP}
"Washington coach Jay Gruden, saying there is no guarantee Reuben Foster will play for Redskins “We hold our standards very high…” And he said it with a straight face." -- Janice Hough

- CP

Tuesday, May 15, 2018

WHAT'S NEW?

The Yankee's powerful new lineup finally asserted itself over the last three weeks going 19-3, with an .864 winning percentage. They've done it with a lot of injuries to both the pitching staff and position players. That's the good news. The bad news is that streak was necessary to catch the Boston Red Sox, who are also sporting a powerful lineup. Should be an interesting summer with these teams having the best records in baseball.

On the other hand, if the AL East is called "The Beast," the AL Central is probably "The Least." The division leading Cleveland Indians are the only team without a losing record and they're only at 20-20, .500.
Speaking of the AL Central, congratulations to the last place Chicago White Sox, who won on Sunday, finally giving them double figures in wins. They are now only 8.5 games out of first.

The AL West boasts three teams on a pace to win 93 games or better. Only 1.5 games separate the top three teams. Maybe MLB should institute a rule that a team has to have a better-than-.500 record to be allowed in the postseason. If there are going to be just 5 teams in the playoffs, we shouldn't have one of the teams be an embarrassment and prevent a good team from participating.

In the NL, the Mets are playing .500 ball, but not lately. They're in fourth place behind the Braves and the Phillies (the Braves and the Phillies?) Last week, Yoenis Cespedes broke a diamond necklace while running the bases. So take that all you people who say the Mets can't put diamonds on the field. The Mets recently dumped former star Matt Harvey because of poor performance (they said). He refuse to go to the bullpen saying he's a starter, not a reliever, then went out and proved it by giving up 7 hits and 7 runs in four appearances. The Mets also suffered the embarrassment of batting out of turn in a game. That's happened to other teams before, but in the first inning? Don't they paste the lineup on the wall of the dugout?

I don't understand...
**Ken Giles of the Houston Astro's was so upset over his performance against the Yankees that he hit himself in the face as he walked off the mound. Twice! Based on his poor outing, I guess he missed the first time.
**During a mound visit by the manager and the trainer to Aroldis Chapman of the Yankees last week, I noticed they also brought an interpreter. The guy has been in the majors for EIGHT years and he still doesn't speak English? I wonder if the catcher has to give the signs in Spanish, too.
**The Supreme Court ruled that New Jersey's law prohibiting betting on sports is not constitutional and ESPN ran a big story on how being able to place bets on sports will change your life. What planet are they living on. It's now 6:15 AM here on the east coast and I can place a bet on anything within the next 10 minutes. The only life change for me will come when the government figures out how to tax my bets.
**Why do sports announcers say that nobody in baseball cares if batters strike out a lot? They accept the strikeouts for the chance to hit home runs? It you hit the ball someplace, anything can happen, some of it good. If you strike out, you've wasted an at bat and that's not good.
**Is some dumb owner really going to pay one of the big free agents available this winter $400 million over 10 years? How can you even spend that kind of money? I mean you can only buy so many pizzas.

***THEY SAID IT***
"Russian president Vladimir Putin, 65, scored seven goals in a pickup hockey game. Now, I don’t want to say the goalie did not try to stop Vlad’s shots, but I’ve seen Kardashians reach harder to pick up a book." -- Alex Kaseberg
"Pittsburgh Pirates pitcher Jameson Taillon says he’s open to urinating on his middle finger to heal a cut on it. Well, this should cut down on excessive autograph requests." -- Janice Hough

"The two youngest players in Major League Baseball — Ronald Acuna Jr., 20, and Ozzie Albies, 21 — both homered for the Braves in a win over the Reds.Not that they’re young or anything but ... after the game teammates took them to Dairy Queen." -- Dwight Perry

"Mets starter Jacob DeGrom threw 45 times in the first inning — and didn't give up a run. Yes; 45 times in one inning. I worked in advertising for 10 years and made fewer pitches." -- RJ Currie
"The Minnesota Golden Gophers football team got a commitment from 6-8, 395-pound Australian lineman Daniel Faalele. Minnesota has lakes that are smaller." -- Brad Dickson
"Rest in peace, Chuck Knox. His conservative/smash-mouth offensive philosophy earned him the nickname “Ground Chuck”" -- The Sports Curmudgeon
"Can someone go into Wikipedia and change the Owner of The Toronto Raptors to LeBron James?" -- Tony Chong

"Almost think golf should have Tiger Woods play every Sunday in a group with the leaders. Just to have Americans pay attention to whoever is actually winning." -- Janice Hough
"Former Raider, Aldon Smith, walked into a police station and blew a .41 blood-alcohol-content, five times the legal limit. That is drunk enough to go into a coma or marry a Kardashian. -- Alex Kaseberg
"Mariners legend Ichiro Suzuki insists he hasn’t decided to retire, he’s just not playing baseball this year. “Way ahead of you,” said the Baltimore Orioles." -- RJ Currie
"Danica Patrick says she is settling into driving Indy cars again, but needs work in traffic. The good part is when she is racing she never has to use the rear view mirror to see who is behind her.." -- Jim Barach

"In just the past eight months, the Kansas cheer team has been suspended and three KU fraternities shut down amid hazing allegations. Turns out the least-threatening thing on campus is the football team." -- Dwight Perry

CP-

Tuesday, May 01, 2018

LET'S FIX BASEBALL

.Sam Miller of ESPN has started a three-part series he calls, "The Radical Ideas Series." He says they are designed to open a conversation to fix baseball. I think baseball does need some work, but Mr. Miller's first idea isn't patently insane.
He suggests that every team make the playoffs and that they would start in September with some complicated format based on their winning percentage, beginning with the worst team playing the 2nd worst, etc. It's winner take all so lose and you go home. Imagine the excitement it would create.
Take last year's Tigers (64-98) playing the White Sox (67-95) in Chicago. You'd be lucky if they could draw 5000 fans from Chicago. On the other hand, 25 players get an extra month off. I still worry about some team with a .500 record knocking off a really good team because of some fluke play.
Keep that thinking cap on, Sam. The next two ideas have to be better.

Are we ever going to have a game when Angel Hernandez is one of the umpires when he doesn't escalate something into an argument when all a player is doing is blowing off steam? He was his usual asinine self Sunday night by chasing after CC Sabathia. CC is known for voicing his displeasure with calls as he walks off the mound. It means nothing. CC has forgotten about it by the time he reaches the dugout. But no, Angel has to chase after him, stopped by Mgr Aaron Boone before it got more out of hand. I've said it many times before: the minute an umpire goes after a player to argue or chastise him, the umpire is wrong. If an umpire got suspended for 5 games whenever that happened, this would stop very quickly.
Can you imagine a game with Country Joe West, Balking Bob Davidson and Angel Hernandez all doing their thing? I guarantee we'd end up with about 6 players on a side left by the 9th inning.

The Yanks were bound to lose eventually and the Astros are certainly no walk in the park. It would have been nice to manage more than 3 hits and 1 run, though. In a game where they only score one run, the Sonny Gray that the Yanks traded for finally showed up. Houston's Charlie Morton looked like he won't lose a game all year. Very dominating. The Yanks won't have to face anyone that overpowering for the rest of the series...wait, Verlander? Keuchel? McCullers? We better hope for a couple of rainouts. What's that? Oh yeah: a dome.

What's with the Dodgers? They're in 4th place, 8 games out. Only three teams in the NL have a worse record. I know, there's still 134 games left, but you don't want to get into too deep a hole. Speaking of strange occurrences, the Miami Marlins have won three in a row. I wouldn't have been surprised if they only won three games in a month. Check back in a month with these two teams.

***THEY SAID IT***
"You can slip us this Mickey anytime: A 1952 Mantle baseball card has sold for $2.88 million — or 384 times the $7,500 he was paid to play that season." -- Dwight Perry
"People are still marveling at Brandon Belt’s at-bat for San Francisco that lasted over 12 minutes against the Angels. Are you kidding me? It took former major leaguer Mike Hargrove 12 minutes just to walk up to the plate." -- Bill Littlejohn
"WR Dez Bryant turned down a multi-season offer from the Ravens in hopes of landing a one-year deal somewhere. Even with the new catch rules, insiders think he dropped the ball." -- RJ Currie
"Ersan Ilyasova said when the 76ers played the Heat “in Miami … the gym was half-empty.” “Half-empty” -or as the Marlins call that, an opening day crowd." -- Janice Hough
"Colin Kaeperinck’s tryout was cancelled at the last minute by The Seahawks. His agent wanted Colin to be in the game only when Seattle was up by more than 17 points inside the 2 minute warning, and he could just come in and take a knee." -- TC Chong
"A 20-year-old Colorado man, Dylan McWilliams survived a rattlesnake bite, a bear bite and a shark bite in a four-year span: “Based on these incidents, we do know a lot about this man. For example, he must taste delicious." -- James Corden

CP-

Thursday, April 26, 2018

THE BRONX BOMBERS ARE BACK

...and with a vengeance. They are currently leading the majors in runs, homers and OPS. I know all you sabermetric fans will disagree, but these are important numbers.
It is very early yet, so things can change drastically in the next few months. Here are a few things that won't look the same come the 4th of July.
** The Washington Nationals are languishing in 4th place with a .440 winning percentage. Too many good pitchers and too many good hitters, including Bryce Harper. They'll be in first on the 4th.
** The Red Sox look like they're running away with it. They won't. Toronto's got some stuff and the Blue Jays will battle the Sox for a playoff spot.
** The Mets are in first place. Enjoy it while you can. There is some bad karma here.
** The Cubs are in 4th place (See the Nationals comment above)
** Arizona is in 1st place. The Dodgers will eventually prevail but the Diamondbacks will make it interesting for a while.
** Yankee shortstop Didi Gregorious, with 9 dingers, is only one homer behind Mike Trout. The projection for him is 44 for the season which is too high, He is definitely helped by the Yankee Stadium dimensions, if the current home stand is any indication. 30-35 is a more reasonable goal. The RBI total is outrageous too.
** Giancarlo Stanton is not blasting homers the way Yankee fans expected. He'll break out eventually, but the only good thing about it is that we don't have to listen to John Sterling's rediculous homer run call - "Non dimenticar, that ball traveled very far"

Gregorious again
After he hit one last night, I told Annie-O that I hoped he wouldn't hit another that game. When she asked why, I told her they would probably have to stop the game while they installed his plaque in Monument Park.

It should be Sonny 'Black'
For a guy who was supposed to be the #2 starter, Sonny Gray has been singularly unimpressive. The Yankee broadcasters' comments are equally ridiculous - "His stuff is too good." I'm not buying that one.
That'll teach him
Did I read this right? The police are searching for WWE wrestler for throwing a cup of coffee at a fellow wrestler. Why didn't he just hit him with a folding chair? The complaint was signed by Starbucks.
Do these guys listen to themselves?
Statement #1 - His fastball is so good, he can throw it right down the middle and get away with it.
Statement #2 later in the game - "No matter how good your fastball is, major league hitters will hit it."
I wish I wasn't listening to them

I'm becoming disenchanted with YES Network's Michael Kay. He's been mis-calling some plays, gets the count wrong and often doesn't know the rules. He questioned why there was no infield fly call made on one play when it didn't qualify. His cohort in crime, Paul O'Neill, a former player, can recite the menu of every concession stand in the park, but he's clueless about the rules, too. I like his insight into the game, but I don't need to hear it three times. His main function seems to be to rag on Michael Kay. Good at it, too.

***THEY SAID IT***
"The Commission on College Basketball has recommended potential lifetime bans for coaches who cheat. Over-under on how many coaches suddenly retire or move to NBA?" -- Janice Hough
"A recent Chicago White Sox home game against the Rays drew 974 fans. Or as the Miami Marlins call it, a really good crowd." -- RJ Currie
"There's talk of a Floyd Mayweather-Connor McGregor rematch. I haven’t been this excited since ‘Rocky V’." -- Brad Dickson

"Patrick Reed has been spotted seemingly everywhere since winning the Masters, still wearing his green jacket. The movie-theater stop proved a bit awkward, however, when patrons wouldn’t stop handing him their tickets." -- TC Chong

"Adults should average no more than one alcoholic drink per day, according to a new international study. With the obvious exception of, say, Browns fans." -- Dwight Perry

"That 21 pitch Brandon Belt AB Sunday lasted longer than some celebrity marriages." -- Janice Hough
"The head count totaled only 974 in attendance for a Rays-White Sox game in Chicago. All the fans bought a hot dog and beer, so the team still made $3 million from the concession stands." -- Jim Barach
"It's hard to believe quarterback Mark Sanchez got caught using a performance enhancing substance. If ever a guy should demand a refund." -- RJ Currie
"If 5½-foot Astros star Jose Altuve ever needs to do some injury rehab in the minors, we’ve found the perfect team to do it with: the Jacksonville Jumbo Shrimp." -- TC Chong

"The Twins had to postpone three straight games against the White Sox because of a nasty spring snowstorm. How can you tell you’re in Minnesota? The catcher tells you one’s a fastball, two’s a curve and three’s a snowball." -- Dwight Perry

" A 112-year-old Japanese man assuming the mantle of world’s oldest man. Man, they keep dying. I’m beginning to think that title is cursed." -- Brad Dickson

CP-

Monday, April 02, 2018

SOME THINGS JUST IRRITATE ME

Not that anyone is surprised at that. The list can be long, depending on how egregious the activities are.
Announcers
Can't they just shut up and let the game itself entertain us? Some comments are fine, but they feel they have to explain everything. Maybe the pitcher just wanted to catch his breath. Maybe he had to sneeze. Don't make up reasons. Sunday, on the Yankee game, even David Cone admitted that they received a tweet saying basically, shut Cone up. Wish I'd said that. In his defense, he does express his opinion on some plays and strategies. Yesterday, in the 9th inning, he vehemently disagreed with walking a hitter intentionally to pitch to the next batter. He was correct - the next hitter blasted a brand slam to win the game.
Baseball's unwritten rules
Sunday, an Oriole hitter bunted for a hit against an extreme Minnesota shift in the ninth with the score 7-0. The Twins were upset, saying it wasn't the way the game should be played. Why not? You gave him the opportunity, why are you upset that he took advantage of it? Don't like all these shifts? Keep doing this and it will stop.
Baseball's written rules
I will never understand why a team will "let" a runner steal a base late in a game because his run means nothing and the runner gets no credit because of "defensive indifference." You LET him get a stolen base, so suffer with the stat.
Speaking of bad stats, earlier this year a saw a pitch go thru a catcher's legs to the backstop that was called a wild pitch, not a passed ball. Why? Because the pitch hit the ground before it got to the plate. It shouldn't matter. This was a major league catcher. It was his job to block that errant pitch. I understand if the ball takes a crazy, unexpected hop and the catcher can't get in front of it, but this ball went thru his legs while he was kneeling down. It wasn't the pitcher's fault, it was yours.
More on announcers
Why are the Yankees making such a big deal about radio announcer John Sterling's home run call. He's run out of good calls. The last one heard that was any good was, "An A-Bomb from A-Rod."
That was okay, His latest was his description of a Giancarlo Stanton homer which was in Italian, no less. I'm Italian and I don't get the reference.
I just wish they would all speak English and not try to describe things in obscure terms. Basketball announcers are the worst. Players don't jump anymore. They go vertical. They don't dribble and shoot, they score off the bounce. They love that bounce thing. They repeat it over and over to show you how hip they are.
"In the seventh inning of the Yankees’ opener in Toronto, Brett Gardner homered over the 375-feet sign. Soon, despite that 375-feet sign in full view in two replays, YES’ David Cone parroted a graphic reporting that the home run was “projected” to have been hit 372 feet." -- Phil Mushnick

The YES network has a new thing: The Nine-Person Booth. All nine of the Yankee broadcast team supposedly in the booth at the same time along with all the variations on how it would work. It's pretty cute, but I suspect I will be sick of it before long. Like, yesterday. They can't stop showing it. Lighten up guys before it becomes monotonous and no longer interesting.

Outside of one good game for Stanton, the Yankee powerhouse hitters have done nothing and the "best bullpen in baseball" has blown two straight games. Here's a baseball axiom that's still true: No matter what the stats say about who's the best, you still have to play the game.

If the list of Yankees on the DL continues to grow, the Nine-Person booth could become the Nine-Person on the field.

Just when you thought things couldn't get sillier
We've all know about the One 'N Done college basketball recruits, but Syracuse Univ. #1 recruit just decide to forgo his one year and signed to play in the NBA's Development League, becoming the first ever None and Done.
I have to stop blogging now and go back to bed so I can stay up to watch NCAA's premier college basketball game - the Final Four Tournament Championship game, which will air at 9:20 tonight. Which means you better be awake at midnight if you want to see the end of the game. And you thought college was the seat of higher learning. Apparently the NCAA never graduated...or attended.

***THEY SAID IT***
"Looks like God may have decided to abandon Sister Jean in favor of Notre Dame women’s team." -- Janice Hough
"Danica Patrick said she's going to the Indy 500 to win it. It could happen. Now excuse me while I go onto Twitter to ask Gal Godat to marry me," -- RJ Currie
"He's the oldest tennis player to be ranked No. 1. Somebody might have mentioned that to me already, but I had a hard time hearing.” -- Roger Federer

"The Cavaliers suspended guard J.R. Smith for one game because he reportedly threw a bowl of soup at assistant coach Damon Jones. Guess you could say he made himself bowl-ineligible." -- Dwight Perry

"Major League Baseball wants to speed up their games to attract “millennials” who find the games too long and boring. How about eliminating: The Anthem; God Bless America; Take Me Out to the Ball Game and Sweet Caroline. That’ll save 25 minutes." -- TC Chong

"The final spring training game between the Angels and Dodgers ended in the fifth inning because of a foul-smelling sewage leak onto the field. Some punchlines just write themselves." -- Janice Hough
"If we find out that Sister Jean accepted money from a booster to steer her away from rooting for DePaul I’ll become even more jaded." -- Brad Dickson
"Michael Strahan is to red-carpet interviews what Ryan Seacrest is to rushing the quarterback.” -- Jerry Perisho
"Five-time Pro Bowl defensive tackle Ndamukong Suh has signed with the Los Angeles Rams. He spent the last three seasons in Miami — his old stomping grounds." -- RJ Currie
"There's a lot of hubbub over Dwight Howard producing the first 30-point, 30-rebound game in 36 years. By the way, Wilt Chamberlain accomplished the feat a mere 124 times." -- Bob Molinaro
"The Arizona D’Backs are trying to speed up games by employing a golf cart to deliver pitchers from the bullpen to the mound. I remember when the Red Sox used that same M.O. and when the vehicle was not used, they sent it down Yawkey Way to pick up fried chicken and beer." -- TC Chong
"Incidentally, Michael Kay finally may have succumbed to the ESPN virus. After Gardner’s opening day homer, he said, “It’s his first of the year.” -- Phil Mushnick

CP-

Thursday, March 15, 2018

MARCH MADNESS - PART II

First of all, congratulations to St. Bonaventure and Syracuse, two local teams who made it through the First Four round. At least one more win each would solidify the NCAA committee's choice to include them.

Nicknames that will mess up my wife's picks:
As you may be aware, her choices often stem from the match-up of nicknames or mascots. Sometimes she has to flip a coin -
Seton Hall Pirates vs. NC State Wolfpack - Both were scourges of the high seas - and mean.
Michigan Wolverines vs Montana Grizzlies - An interesting match-up in the forest, on the court, not so much.
Kentucky Wildcats vs Davidson Wildcats - "What do I do now???"
Auburn Tigers vs Charleston Cougars - Well, the tiger is bigger.

Where we differ:
She likes Alabama "Roll 'Tide." I will root for Auburn - War Eagle.
     When we were on a trip down south, we stayed in Tuscaloosa, Alabama. Everywhere you went, we saw "Roll Tide signs and banners. Later, We stopped at a gift shop in Montgomery, Alabama. I was looking thru some pins on the counter and Anne asked me what I was looking for. "I wanted to see if there was a "Roll Tide" pin," I said, laughing. From behind, a loud booming voice said, "Y'all in Auburn country, now." It was a little old white-haired lady glaring at me. "Yes Ma'am," I said as I scurried away.

I like to watch Duke play. She likes ABGA (Anybody But Grayson Allen). I actually see her point.

Anne asked who St. Bonaventure would be playing next. I told her they would be in with the big boys, now. Actually, #1, 2, or 3 seeded teams against are not automatic winners against teams seeded #10, 11, 12 etc. That's one of the beautiful things about college basketball. No matter how large your enrollment is, you can only put five guys on the court at once. This makes for competitive games where you wouldn't think there would be.

I can't do a posting without some mention of baseball.
** The NY Yankees have had their wrist slapped by MLB because Aaron Judge told Manny Machado of the Orioles, "You'd look nice in pin stripes."   Baseball called that very close to tampering. Yeah, like Judge decides who the Yankees will sign. Instead of concerning himself with off-the-cuff kidding between ballplayers, why doesn't Commissioner Manfred pay more attention to improving the pace of play in a reasonable manner instead of the ridiculous ideas he's come up with so far.
** Like these changes that are under consideration.
   Start extra innings with men on base, from a man on second with no outs to bases loaded with no outs. This flies in the face of the integrity of the game.
   Start extra innings with a three and two count on every batter. This like a beer game. Might as well have a keg out at second base. Actually, that's not such a bad idea.
   Let the managers start each extra inning with whatever lineup he wants. If you're going to do that, why not let each teams best home-run hitter bat continually until he makes three outs or hits a homer.
All of these ideas is meant to keep teams from having 17 or 18 inning games. Yeah, like we have one or two of those every week.
I will repeat the only thing they have to do to shorten games is KEEP THE HITTER IN THE BATTER'S BOX. There, was that so hard?

***THEY SAID IT***
"Drew Brees turned down much larger guaranteed offers to resign with Saints. Nice to know that it’s not ALL about $$$. Though guessing Drew can still feed his family on $25 mill even if 2nd year not guaranteed."   -- Janice Hough
"Frances McDormand’s Academy Award was stolen during an Oscars after party. No truth to the rumor that the perp was wearing a Tom Brady jersey." -- Dwight Perry
"About last Sunday’s Oscars telecast, Michael Strahan is to red-carpet interviews what Ryan Seacrest is to rushing the quarterback." -- Jerry Perisho
"Warriors coach Steve Kerr said undrafted college basketball players should be allowed to return to school, which is different than the 1960s, when students enrolled in school mainly to avoid being drafted." -- Jim Barach

"Dolphins going to release Ndamukongsuh. Ouch, that will really stomp on his ego." -- Janice Hough
"Canadian skicross racer Dave Duncan apologized for his arrest in PyeongChang for stealing a car while intoxicated. Can’t recall Duncan? He’s the skier whose bib had a cup holder." -- RJ Currie
"Two U.S. gold medal-winning snowboarders are 17. When I was 17, I’d just gotten the training wheels off my bike." -- Brad Dickson
" Anybody honestly believe the Dolphins are better without Ajayi, Landry and Suh? It’s like you own a car dealership and your first order of business is to fire your most productive, top-earning salesmen." -- Greg Cote

CP-

Read more here: http://www.miamiherald.com/sports/spt-columns-blogs/greg-cote/article204717914.html#storylink=cpy

Tuesday, March 13, 2018

MARCH MADNESS

It's my favorite sporting event. Why?
1) Well, it's not just one game, it's many.
2) If you root for your team and they lose, there's another "favorite" team playing later that day (Actually sounds like my dating history).
3) College teams have cheerleaders who actually get excited about the game and aren't paid to jump around in skimpy outfits.
4) The cheerleaders jump around in skimpy outfits
5) EVERY game is sudden death. That makes for exciting finishes because teams go all out even if they're behind by 10 points with 30 seconds left.
6) Coaches run up and down the sideline getting more exercise than they've gotten in years.
7) I don't need Dick Vitale to tell me it's an exciting game.    BABY!
8) There's a hero in every game.
9) Did I mention the skimpy outfits?
10) I love the odd nicknames for some of the teams. (Can you say you root for the Hokies with a straight face?)
11) Did I mention...oh yeah, I did.

The usual comments on match-ups
There are odd match-ups that occur accidentally because the "committee" picks them by the team records. My way is much more fun.
** It can't happen, but wouldn't a Final Four consisting of Villanova, Kentucky, Arizona and Kansas State be interesting? You could root for the "Wildcats" and not be disappointed in the outcome. (Sorry Davidson, but I had to choose four)
** There's only three Tigers in the mix this year: Clemson, Auburn and Missouri. If Princeton had made it, we could have had another fun Final Four. Or a better Elite Eight.
** Some nicknames I don't recall seeing before.
     Brooklyn Blackbirds (If they lose, you could sing "Bye Bye Blackbirds)
     Radford Highlanders (Could be embarrassing to play in those kilts)
     Lipscomb Bisons (Bisons, Yes. Lipscomb, not so much)
     Marshall Thundering Herd (I understand the starting five averages 295 pounds)

More on match-up tomorrow, In the meantime, a sad note. The Omaha World Herald has decided to drop "Breakin' Brad," a humor column written by my friend Brad Dickson. Apparently, newspapers aren't above making dumb decisions. There's enough bad news in the world and humor helps us to deal with it. Mr. Dickson was one of the best at providing that valuable humor. Anne Murray sings, "I really could use a little good news today." We've just lost some.

***THEY SAID IT***
"Heading to March Madness, 64 down to 1. And besides the possible Trump administration resignations, there’s a basketball tournament going on." -- Janice Hough
"Ex-Nebraskan Molly Schuyler won the Wing Bowl by downing 501 chicken wings, an average of 16.7 wings per minute — breaking the old record held by a garbage disposal." -- Brad Dickson[I'm going to miss this - CP]

"Forrest Whitley, the Astros’ 6-foot-7 fireballing mound prospect, has been tagged with a 50-game suspension after failing a drug test. Club officials figured something was amiss last season when his errant spring-training pickoff attempt in West Palm Beach, Fla., finally rolled to a stop in Okeechobee." -- Dwight Perry

" WWE legend and porn star Sunny was arrested on contempt of court and fugitive charges. She is reportedly in jail, where all holds are barred" -- RJ Currie
"The U.S. is sitting sixth in the medal count halfway through the Winter Olympics — behind Russia, Which isn’t even officially here. I was pretty fired up about that. That’s like losing a bar bet to an empty stool." -- Michael Rosenberg

"Reports are that Peyton Manning could make $10 Million a year as an analyst for Fox Sports or ESPN. And that’s before he mentions Budweiser or Papa John’s every 15 minutes." -- Janice Hough
"Arkansas landed an inside linebacker named Bumper Pool. Now the Razorbacks are searching for an outside backer named Lawn Darts." -- Brad Dickson

"Danica Patrick’s NASCAR career ended with a win-loss record of 0 for 191. “See? Now leave me alone!” said Anna Kournikova." -- RJ Currie
"The U.S. topped Canada to reach the gold-medal match in men’s curling. That’s like the U.S. beating Italy in pasta-making." -- Roy Neese

CP-

Monday, February 19, 2018

BASEBALL! IT'S FINALLY HERE!

It's Spring Training, the time when every team is a potential champion - at least according to the media. Even the players are strutting about, proclaiming the virtues of their team. As usual, there will be the contenders and the pretenders.
There will be the five elite teams and the one sleeper. Houston, Dodgers, Cleveland, Washington and Yankees.will contend. The Angels, Boston, Cubs and Arizona will put up a fight but probably won't make the World Series. The Brewers and Twins were last years sleepers. This year, I think it will be the Tampa Bay Rays.
The Yanks will be a lot of fun to watch with all the big bats in the lineup. And I mean BIG. Mike Lupica, NY Daily News, describes them this way. "They're not built to break records. They're built to break windows." This should be fun.

Money, money, money
I don't believe it. I thought that this year, Scott Boras would finally learn that he's NOT the smartest man in baseball. Teams would no longer be willing to pay out big bucks and long term contracts to players just to get the one or two good years out of them. We made it all the way to spring training before Boras found that "one dumb owner." It was San Diego. They just signed Eric Hosmer to a deal that qualifies them as this year's "ODO." 5 years @ $20 million per year plus 3 more years @ $13 million per year.This for a guy 28 years old. He has averaged 20 homers a year with a batting average of .284 over seven years. Good numbers but is that really worth $139 million? Of course, we're talking about a team who traded for Chase Headly without a gun to their heads. There are still a lot of decent ballplayers still unsigned and some of them will remain that way. Even Scott Boras has to be scratching his head.

Let's use our heads (What am I saying?)
Can we please bring some sense of reason to baseball's suggestions on how to shorten the games? They have suggested putting a man on second to start every inning after the 10th. Start every inning after 12 with the bases loaded and no outs.
They want a pitch clock and a batting clock. These are too hard to control. There are so many parameters that it will take a Philadelphia lawyer to figure out when to start them and when someone has violated the rule. You want to speed up the game without corrupting the basic sport? Two simple rules:
1) Limit trips to the mound to one per inning, whether it's the coach, manager, catcher or infielder. Unless there's and injury, a second visit means the pitcher is out of the game. Fake the injury and manager is also ejected.
2) Keep the damn hitter in the box. I don't care about swings and misses, foul balls or looking for signs. Keep him in the box.
While we're at it, eliminate Instant Replay and Challenges. There's 15 minutes a game right. there. Even with the arguments. Besides, I like arguments.
As Groucho Marx said, “Outside of the improvement, no one should notice a thing.”

Another suggestion
I am not a fan of play-by-play broadcasters and analysts in the booth. They all need to fill every minute with words which end up being just blather. Please shut up. We can see the same thing you see. We don't need you to explain it. And stop with the "cute" terms. The player did not "go vertical." for cripes sake. He JUMPED. Why do we need so many people to announce the game? That's easy to fix. Just make the booths smaller. A lot smaller.
Your screaming does not make the play more exciting. Listen to Bode Miller analyze skiing. Very calm and informative. Please tell us the truth. Tara Lipinski and Johnny Weir are not afraid to say that some skating judging is absolutely insane. We know it, we saw it, too. It's not blasphemy to voice that opinion. I like their outfits, too, but Johnny is going to have to explain his hair. How can it grow three inches overnight?

***THEY SAID IT***
Patriots coach Bill Belichick, was asked by reporters what the difference between this Super Bowl and his previous seven: “This one is in Minnesota.”

"Fontbonne of St. Louis beat Greenville (Ill.) 164-154 in overtime Wednesday night, breaking the NCAA Division III record for combined points.In other words, they scheduled a D-III men’s basketball game, and the NBA All-Star Game broke out." -- Dwight Perry

"The Canadian women’s hockey team defeated the United States at the Winter Olympics. These Canadians were mostly late bloomers. Some of them didn’t pick up a hockey stick until they were 9 months old." -- Brad Dickson

" So this is how you judge Slope-Style Skateboarding: The winner was determined by who came as close as possible to killing himself while remaining standing on his board." - Phil Mushnick

"Team Norway at the Olympics got 15,000 eggs instead of the 1,500 they ordered. So far the Norwegians are clean of PEDs, but their cholesterol is off the charts." -- RJ Currie

"One problem with Winter Olympics is just when we begin to figure out what, for example, a good slalom run looks like, the events are over." -- Janice Hough

"Serena Williams won the Australian Open a year ago while eight weeks pregnant. I think we’ve finally found something that Roger Federer can't do on a tennis court." -- Bob Molinaro
"The Yankees have acquired the baseball rights to the Seahawks’ Russell Wilson. Imagine how the Jets and Giants feel, knowing that the Yankees have the best QB in New York." -- Brett Miller
"Striking strippers in New York canceled plans to perform in Philadelphia this past week after they were told the poles there were coated with Crisco and hydraulic fluid." -- Tony Chong
" Ex-Nebraskan Molly Schuyler won the Wing Bowl by downing 501 chicken wings, an average of 16.7 wings per minute — breaking the old record held by a garbage disposal." -- Brad Dickson

"Among Oregon’s football recruits this year: Habakkuk Baldonado, a defensive end from Clearwater, Fla. Talk about mixed reviews: He’s rated a three-star recruit by 247 Sports but only one star by the National Association of Copy Editors." -- Dwight Perry

"Wait a minute, how did Shaun White get to be 31 years old? I didn’t know they allowed snowboarders to be over 30." -- Janice Hough

"A brawl broke out in a professional rugby game in the country of Georgia, complete with punching, kicking and bloodshed. Then things got really violent: they played rugby." -- RJ Currie

CP-

Thursday, January 18, 2018

26 DAYS TO GO

Pitchers and catchers report in less than 4 weeks (Feb 13th) with position players due 5 days later. This promises to be one of the most interesting Yankee seasons in a long time. To paraphrase Chris Berman: "They...could...go...all...the...way!"
In the meantime --
WHO
It's Hall of Fame time again, a very frustrating time for me, since voters have turned it into the Hall of the Very Good. There are 33 names on this year's ballot and I see five that should be elected, in my humble opinion.That's a lot for the harsh taskmaster that I am. The five:
Trevor Hoffman
Mike Mussina
Jim Thome
Gary Sheffield
Curt Schilling
I know that flies in the face of many writers who say that because they can only vote for ten players, a lot of worthy candidates will be left out. There are a few that are close, but not quite.
Wait-till-next-year would include the 2 Jones boys, Chipper and Andruw,Vlad Guerrero, Jeff Kent and Edgar Martinez. And of course, the steroid boys, Bonds, Clemens, and Sosa.
Interesting note about Sammy Sosa. The owner of the Chicago Cubs, Tom Ricketts, says that Sosa isn't welcome back to Wrigley Field until he owns up to his steroid use. Of course, since Sammy "doesn't speak or understand English," he probably doesn't know what's going on.
WHAT
Poor sportswriters, they don't have anything to report. There are lots of rumors but no free agent signings or trades of any significance since the Yanks nailed Stanton. Yu Darvish, the biggest name still out there, has named the only six teams he will sign with and still no movement. This is the Scott Boras Philosophy at it's finest. Who will blink first? Will the free agents lower their asking price significantly or will some team finally panic and offer a ridiculous contract? We will see.
I DON'T KNOW
There is a lot of talk lately about the New England Patriots being the beneficiary of a number of penalty calls that have helped them win games all year. Are they in fact getting all the breaks? It's possible but then others say, good teams make their own breaks. No one knows for sure and the officials on the field certainly aren't going to say.
What's happening in the NBA? The teams are complaining that there are a lot of Technical Fouls being called and that most of them are uncalled for. The players claim that the officials hare exercising a vendetta against the players. Again, you'll never get the officials to admit that or even explain what they think is happening. Supposedly, the two sides will sit down at the All-Star break and iron things out.
I DON'T CARE
The networks are afraid that will be the attitude of the viewers if the Super Bowl ends up being a Minnesota - Jacksonville game. No major market team can mean low viewership and worse yet, lower commercial income. Now we can't have THAT, can we? Well, I don't care,

GOOD NEWS, BAD NEWS
The Good: Utah Jazz Rodney Hood was fined $35,000 by the league after slapping the cell phone out of the hand of a fan as he left the arena after being ejected from the game. Would have been better if it was $50,000. When are these prima donnas going to realize that those fans are the life blood of the sport and should be treated with respect?
The Bad: We have lost Keith Jackson, one of the best sports announcers ever. He understood all the sports he covered and did not try to impose his personality over the actual game. I will miss his pet phrase - "Whoa Nellie!" Goodbye, Keith.

***THEY SAID IT***
"Boston recorded a temperature of minus-30 degrees. And that was just between Bill Belichick and Tom Brady." -- Brad Dickson
"Word is Maria Sharapova has unleashed a record-level shriek of 119 decibels. It happened when Australian Open officials announced the withdrawal of Serena Williams." -- RJ Currie

"The Cleveland Browns just threw in the towel on the 2017 season. To no one’s surprise, it was intercepted and returned for a touchdown." -- Dwight Perry

"What's it like living in New York City in the 1970s. I used to jog 5 miles a day — 2 for my health, 3 for my life." -- Marc Sheffler

"LaVar Ball told USA Today his son Lonzo is a better player than Steph Curry. If there was a concussion tent in basketball, they’d never let LaVar out of it" -- RJ Currie

"NBC announced that it will air over 2,400 hours of Winter Olympics coverage. Well, 2,402 hours counting the men’s events." -- Brad Dickson
"The expansion Las Vegas Knights’ have a 17-2-1 home record. Does the policy of having the visiting team partake in the ‘two-drink minimum’ have anything to do with this?" -- TC Chong
" Since we are now looking at a possible Minnesota-Jacksonville Super Bowl, neither with a quarterback most Americans have heard of, I guess this might be a game where people really do watch for the commercials." -- Janice Hough
"Jennifer Lopez publicly suggested Alex Rodriguez should be the next Yankees manager. Really? Last anyone heard, A-Rod had his hands full managing himself." -- RJ Currie
"There’s nothing so wrong with the NFL that it couldn’t be fixed by a reasonably well-aimed nuclear warhead." -- Phil Mushnick

CP-