Friday, May 20, 2016

THE QUARTERLY REPORT

With 25% of the season in the bank, there are some interesting things going on.

** The Cubs have lost 5 of their last 10 games - which gives then 11 for the year. They're still on a pace to win about 115 games. Meanwhile, Atlanta and Minnesota are a pace to LOSE 120 games.

** Chris Sale is 9-0, Jake Arrieta is 7-0 as is Stephen Strasburg. We may see the first 30-game winner since Denny McLain back in 1968. Maybe more than one.

** Dwayne Wade kept shooting baskets before a game while they were playing the Canadian National Anthem. Very classy, Dwayne. Don't expect any votes for the Canadian Sportsman of the Year.


** Yankee owner, Hal Steinbrenner, recently told the press that he holds the players responsible for the Yankee's horrible start, not Joe Girardi. Well, the players aren't helping, but Girardi should be shouldering a lot of the blame. He manages every game as though it was the 7th game of the World Series. Last night he couldn't wait to bring in the big three guns in the bullpen for the third time, even though he said he would avoid doing that. There was even a good reason to take the starter out. Nova pitched 6 strong innings, had thrown only 62 pitches and was never really threatened.
I can understand physical errors but when players look like their heads aren't in the game, that's the managers fault. There are multiple poor decisions on the field every game. That's your job, Joe.

Here are Yankee beat writer Andrew Marchand's suggestions about what  King George Steinbrenner would do if he was still around.
1. FIRE JOE GIRARDI   (Well, this is a given - and it would have happened a month ago)
2. HIRE BOBBY VALENTINE  (Ugh! I don't like this one)
3. HIRE SEAT-FILLERS  (Just like the Oscars. Sure, why not)
4. FIRE BOBBY V  (Now you're talking)
5. HIRE WALLY BACKMAN  (Who? Oh, 'cause he's a former Met. Yeah, that'll work)
6. RIP JACOBY ELLSBURY IN THE MEDIA  (One of George's favorite tricks & a good place to start)
7. FIRE WALLY BACKMAN  (This doesn't surprise anyone, does it?)
8. MAKE A-ROD PLAYER-MANAGER  (If this isn't a match made in heaven, I don't know what is.)
9. PUT BRIAN CASHMAN ON NOTICE  (On notice? You mean he hadn't fired him already?)
10. GO AFTER JOHN OLIVER  (A feud with a talk show host? Who'd believe that? Well, everybody.)
BONUS: TRADE OUTFIELD PROSPECT AARON JUDGE  (Just Judge? How about Bird too?)

Picasner's bonus: Rehire Joe Girardi. (Oh, like that's never happened.)
And the best part is - They haven't even played the All-Star game yet.

** You gotta love the Atlanta Braves. They fired their manager in the middle of a road trip and don't even tell him. They just booked a flight for him back to Atlanta and let the airlines send a notice about the flight.

** We've all seen the fight between Bautista and Odor and the punishments have been handed out. I have one last take on this. Did Joey Bats really do anything wrong? He slid right over the bag, never really clipped Odor and made no obvious effort to hurt him. Why was he suspended? Let's dump "the Utley rule".

***THEY SAID IT***
"The Atlanta Braves have a concession item called Burgerizza which is a 20-ounce beef patty covered in bacon, five slices of cheese and served between two pepperoni pizzas. Maybe the Braves won't win, but you can feed a family of five with this."  -- Brad Dickson
"Tom Brady has sold out his new cookbook at $200 each. The original price was $225, but they adjusted for deflation."  -- RJ Currie
"Nationals pitcher Max Scherzer, fresh off his record-tying 20-strikeout game, took a selfie standing under the sign at the intersection of 20th and K streets in downtown Washington."  -- Dwight Perry
"Russian sports minister does about-face and admits their athletes were doping, saying that he’s ‘ashamed of them. On a related note, his funeral is scheduled for next week."  -- Fark.com
"Texas second baseman Rougned Odor was handed an eight game suspension for his part in the brawl vs the Blue Jays. This will give him enough time to sign an endorsement contract with Hawaiian Punch."  -- TC Chong

"There's an allegation the Russians cheated at past Olympic Games. Take that time Russia set a world record in the four-man bobsled while going uphill. That was suspect."  -- Brad Dickson
"After two complete games back to back for the SF Giants pitching staff, Jeff Samardzija goes 8 innings allowing only 1 earned run. Wimp."  -- Janice Hough
"Max Scherzer threw 20 K’s last Wednesday against the Tigers. That ties a record for striking out I set at my Grade 12 graduation dance."  -- RJ Currie
"A huge brawl broke out between the Toronto Blue Jays and Texas Rangers. I watched for two minutes before I realized it wasn't an NHL classic game."  -- Brad Dickson

"Mets pitcher Colon — married for 21 years with four children — is being sued for child support by a woman who says he fathered two kids with her, the New York Post reported. Which certainly isn’t what Ernie Banks had in mind when he said, “Let’s play two!"  -- Dwight Perry
" Lebron James: “I have no idea what a common foul and flagrant foul is.” Based on this postseason, neither do NBA refs."  -- Janice Hough

CP-
 

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