Friday, August 21, 2015

OH YEAH, THE YANKEES

That seems to be ESPN's attitude. When Toronto was playing out of their minds. the talking heads at ESPN couldn't wait to declare them champions of the AL East. The Yanks are fading, Toronto secured the best pitcher and the best hitter available before the trading deadline and the Blue Jays went on an 11-game winning streak, including a beat down of the Yankees in their own stadium.
When the baseball gods turned around, as they always do, there was no reversal from their previous stance: the Jays are still the champs, just uncrowned at the moment. Okay, they're not alone - the Orioles are coming fast, too.  The Yankees - well, they're having a cute little moment for the time being.          I like cute!

Cashman wouldn't trade his phenoms last month, and we're getting to see why now. Luis Severino is the real deal and Aaron Judge is tearing up the minors. And as for Greg Bird - his only problem as far as I can see, is his name. The Daily News has already said, "The Bird Is The Word,"  one announcer called him "Big Bird," and John Sterling's home run call is, predictably, "Bye Bye Birdie." Maybe he's not ready to replace what's-his-name..Mark Teixeira...but he's no stopgap, so enough with the Wally Pipp talk.

Around the League
## You can quit calling the AL East a weak division. If you want weak, take a look at the AL Central. They still have only one team over .500, the KC Royals.
## The NL Central is a different story. The Cubs are in third place, but their record, 17 games over .500, would put them in first place in every other division in baseball except the AL Central.
## The Detroit Tigers have been a powerhouse for several years now, thanks in no small part to their GM, Dave Dombrowski, but when things went sour this year, the Tigers made a move that probably wasn't too smart, but did give the newspapers an alliterative headline: Dave Dombrowski Dumped.
## What are the Dodgers doing? They gave up two more prospects to acquire Chase Utley from the Phillies. Utley was once a very good player, but at 36, he may have played out the string. The Dodgers will be paying him $2 million for six weeks of service, probably not the best use of their money. Since their payroll is almost $300 million, it would appear that those pockets are very, very deep.
## Joe Girardi got thrown out of last night's game for...I guess just walking out to talk to home plate umpire Dan Iassogna, not the most patient of umpires. Iassogna is not very good at balls and strikes and doesn't like to be told about it. He tossed Girardi before he even got to home plate. This is quite a crew anyway, with CB "You're Outa Here" Buckner helping to incite arguments of all kinds. Buckner will be behind home plate tonight and he's no better at calling pitches, so look for some excitement again tonight.

***THEY SAID IT***
"Have you seen the recent courtroom sketch of Tom Brady? It’s the worst quarterback draw since the Mark Sanchez butt fumble."  -- RJ Currie
"49ers wide receiver Jerome Simpson’s has now been suspended six game for violating the league’s substance abuse policy, his third suspension since 2012. It’s all part of the NFL’s “10 strikes and you’re out policy."  -- Janice Hough
"An Alabama football fan waited in line four days to be first at Crimson Tide Fan Day. Actually, in Alabama this is an acceptable excuse for missing work."  -- Brad Dickson
"The legally challenged Florida State football team had two team photos taken this year because:
a) Coach Jimbo Fisher wanted one with suspended running back Dalvin Cook in the picture and one without. b) Tallahassee Police requested front and side views."  -- Dwight Perry
"Jets QB Geno Smith will be out 6-10 weeks when his jaw was broken in a locker room fight. An unnamed source said that Geno tried to fight back but 3 of his punches fell short, and another 2 were intercepted."  -- Tony Chong
"Buffalo signed QB-puncher IK Enemkpali. First day in the Bills’ locker room, Enemkpali had his lunch money stolen by Richie Incognito."  -- Greg Cote
"A Nepalese teen set a world record by kicking himself in the head 134 times in one minute:. He broke the previous record of zero."  -- Conan O'brien
"Jason Pierre-Paul’s concussion protocol going forward, you have to assume, won’t include the question: “How many fingers?”  -- Dwight Perry

"The Brooklyn Cyclones, a minor league baseball team, are offering a provolone-stuffed sausage topped with pulled pork. This sounds like something Gov. Ricketts would come up with to carry out the death penalty."  -- Brad Dickson
" New Red Sox GM “Dave Dombrowski – “I’m not here to blow up the operation.” And Boston fans are thinking “Hasn’t the current team accomplished that already?”  -- Janice Hough
"Despite rumours to the contrary, Jets pivot Geno Smith’s disloacted jaw wasn’t caused by trying to pronounce the name of linebacker Ikemefuna Chinedum Enemkpali."  -- RJ Currie
"‘Pacman’ Jones says he’d have $100 million if it were not for suspensions. He’d have $200 million if not for strip clubs."  -- Bill Littlejohn
"Maria Sharapova and Serena Williams are the highest paid female athletes in the world. After hearing this, Ronda Rousey beat them up and took their money."  -- Conan O'Brien

CP-
 

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