## It seem there is a new Olympic rule: If you don't win, protest. The Russians have protested the American Hockey Team win over Russia in a shootout, because a 3rd period Russian goal was disallowed by an American referee because the net had become dislodged. The Russians say it wasn't and claimed, "...the fix was in." That's the old Olympic spirit.
## The American speed skating squad claim the new suits they were given before the Olympics not only didn't improve their performances, they may have hindered them. One part of the controversy dwells on some vents in the rear of the suits were not aero-dynamic. They were supposed to allow body heat to escape. So much for secret American advanced technology.
## Not so good news out of Florida. The Yanks new million dollar pitcher, Masahiro Tanaka had a lot of trouble trying to run a mile during a workout yesterday. Tanaka said himself that he had, "a lot of trouble during the last four laps." So he can't run. You don't have to run the ball up to the plate.
## How did the Yankees miss this one? The Mets are offering an "Ultimet" ticket. With the purchase of this ticket, you get a $10 certificate good for some of the food concessions in the park. Not a bad deal. Or is it? the fine print says, "If you choose this offer, an additional $10 will automatically be added to your shopping cart." So you get to spend money at a concession stand that you have already partially paid for.
## The US Army has announced that they have developed a pizza for the soldiers that will last on the shelf for three years. What's the big deal? Hasn't Papa John's been doing that for years?
## Morgan Shepard is attempting to become the oldest driver to compete in the Dayton 500 at age 72. At least now when he drives around the track with his left blinker on...he means it.
***THEY SAID IT***
"Curling would be a lot more fun to watch if they could run the competition simultaneously on the ice with figure skating." -- Janice Hough
"Derek Jeter said he will retire at the end of the 2014 season. MLB is
bracing for approximately 2 million “Take A-Rod with you” grandstand
signs" -- Brad Dickson.
"A Swedish skier wiped out after his pants fell down. If this is your
favorite Olympic moment so far, you are probably not a true connoisseur
of winter sports." -- Brad Dickson
"Canadian Olympic ice dancer Tessa Virtue may be lithe and
beautiful, but if I met her at a party I wouldn't give her a second
look. In a related story, my wife is my proofread." -- RJ Currie
" Morehead State basketball player Chad Posthumus
hasn’t picked up any dead-ball fouls. ... If Posthumus winds up as the
national rebounding champion, how will the award be awarded?" -- Scott Ostler
"Seahawks defensive end Michael (“This isn’t Costco”) Bennett says the
team won’t be getting a home-team discount when it comes time to
negotiate his new contract. In keeping with his stellar 2013 season, he’s demanding enough cash to fill 8.5 sacks." -- Dwight Perry
"I have been told there is one actual sport, biathlon, that involves both
cross-country skiing and shooting guns. That happens to be a very popular sport in Miami, but without
the cross-country skiing part." -- Greg Cote
"Bob Costas didn’t go back to the U.S. for treatment of his conjunctivitis. The only flights out were red-eyes." -- TC Chong
"Russian figure skater Evgeni Plushenko withdrew because of a back injury. As he was coming off the ice, he tripped and fell on the carpet and,
out of habit, the Russian judge gave him a perfect score." -- Alex Kaseberg
CP-
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