...and then the Superbowl commercials will air. Oh, they might show us a football game too, if they can fit it in. It's become such an "event," that it's really not about the game anymore. Announcers, analysts and sideline reporters will fall all over themselves to inundate us with facts and figures totally irrelevant to the game. Who cares what the Bronco's record was on third down, with 8 or more yards to go, on a slippery field, going into the wind...well, you get the idea. We will be told every last detail about the lives of any player who shows up in the game. I don't care what his background is. Just tell us who made the tackle, if you can find the time. I'm sure the coaches are as repulsed as I am to have to listen to Erin Andrews ask him if he's wearing long underwear as he runs out onto the field. I MIGHT be interested in what kind of underwear Erin is wearing, but that should be on a different program.
You can bet on anything for the Superbowl, from something like who scores first, or will there be a safety right down to who has the best touchdown dance. Here's some you won't see:
THREE! The over/under on how many times we will be forced to see the replay of Richard Sherman's post-game interview where he trashed 49ers wide receiver, Michael Crabtree.
TWO! The over/under on the number of times we will be shown pictures of the three Manning quarterbacks together, Archie, Peyton and Eli.
MILLIONS! The over/under on the number of viewers who will mute the sound by the third quarter. I've been practicing for a week now, so I could hit that button in the dark.
How long before Seahawks coach Pete Carroll throws a tantrum on the sidelines?
The game might not turn out to be much, but the commercials will be entertaining.
What special meal will Annie-O prepare to celebrate the game (Depends on what fast-food coupons she has.)
Thoughts on the Syracuse-Miami basketball game. It's been like all year: Syracuse falls behind a team they should beat easily, but they never panic. Nobody gets out of control, they just quietly settle down and win the game. A different guy steps up to make the big play or score the tough basket. Tyler Ennis is becoming one of the top point guards in Division I. Are there any worse announcers than the two drones who did this game? They were so busy giving us worthless info, they neglected to tell us "minor" little facts like, who was the fouls on, how many fouls does a player have, and who made a turnover. Every time they disagreed with a referee's decision, the announcers turned out to be wrong. Of course, they favored Miami the whole game, so that played into their opinions. Are they really going to work the Syracuse-Duke game next week? Where's that mute button?
It's been four days now, since the Yankees signed Masahiro Tanaka and the analysts have spoken. Tanaka will either be great, mediocre or a bust, depending on who you listen to.
***THEY SAID IT***
"Sports Media not sure how it's going to fit Superbowl coverage into just two short weeks." -- TheOnion.com
"The first Pro Bowl draft was held last week. You think a lot of people try to get out of jury duty ...
To give you an idea how many players passed on playing, this year it’ll be an eight-man game." -- Brad Dickson
"The East Coast has been hit with Blizzard-like conditions, less than two weeks before Super Bowl XLVIII in East Rutherford, N.J. The Seahawks really ought to do the right thing and and offer to let them play the big game in Seattle." -- Dwight Perry
"Tiger Woods missed the secondary cut at this weekend’s tournament at
Torrey Pines. Which means at least a few hundred more casual American
sports fans will be forced to watch the NFL Pro Bowl." -- Janice Hough
"UFC champ Ronda Rousey said she
secretly wants to have “57 babies” with retired MMA great Fedor
Emelianenko. NBA players were shocked: "Having kids with just one person?" -- RJ Currie
" Whoever introduced Archie and Olivia Manning has now officially cost the Patriots four championships." -- Mike Vaccaro
"In Madison Square Garden, patrons honored King’s legacy by booing the
Knicks and purchasing 10 cents worth of beer for nine bucks." -- Phil Mushnick
CP-
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