Saturday, April 20, 2013

TRUTH IS STRANGER THAN FICTION

In the  sports world, that's always true.

## The Yanks won last night, just the way they weren't supposed to - with an aging pitcher and the home run ball. Is there some kind of magic elixir in the Yankee pinstripes that makes supposed over-the-hill players perform like they were in their prime? The only addition that was expected to provide production is Travis Hafner. The others, Wells, Overbay, and Youkilis, are stop-gaps, expected to hold down the fort until the big guns get back. Instead, they don't look like they're willing to give up their jobs without a fight. They are still hitting a collective .287 with 13 homers & 31  RBIs. There isn't a team in the league that wouldn't take that production from any four guys. And I haven't mentioned Robinson Cano yet.

## Last night, Milwaukee shortstop, Jean Segura, stole second base in the 8th inning of a game with the Chicago Cubs. Last night, Jean Segura was thrown out trying to steal second base in the 8th inning. Raise your hand if you went back and read the first sentence again. Well, both sentences are factual.
Here's how it happened. After successfully stealing second, Segura tried to steal third and got caught in a rundown. He made it back to second safely, only to discover that his team mate, Ryan Braun, was now occupying second also. The Cub infielder tagged both men, and by rule, Braun was called out. BUT, Segura thought HE was out and started to trot off the field. When he got close to first base, his coach told him to stay there. Now, he's back on first with one out. after a strikeout by Rickie Weeks, Segura tried to steal second again and was thrown out. Stole second AND caught stealing at second. That story should win you a few beers in a trivia contest some day.
But I wouldn't make the bet in a Milwaukee bar, if I were you.

## It's time for a football story. Baltimore manager, Buck Showalter, and NY Jets head (and I use the term loosely) coach, Rex Ryan, are having a bit of a set to. The world champion Baltimore Ravens are scheduled to have their season opener at home on the same night the Orioles are playing at home against the White Sox. Ryan thinks it's disgraceful that the Oriole game should go head-to-head against the Ravens game. Besides, they share the same parking lot and that would be a madhouse. Ryan says the Orioles should just "...give up their home game, because, after all, they have 80 other games at home, and the Ravens should be able to celebrate their championship uncontested." Showalter says the Ryan ought to pay attention to the Jets and not try to run Major League baseball.
The date at issue here is Thursday, September 5th. If this is such a big deal, why couldn't the Ravens game be moved back to the 4th. It wouldn't be a hardship on anyone, it's the first game of the season.
But let's deal with the main issue here. MLB announced their schedule  before the Ravens had even won their championship. The NFL announced THEIR schedule yesterday. No one was able to sit down and say, "Wait a minute, we've got a conflict here."  Is it possible the schedulers weren't even aware of the conflicting dates? Even worse, Rex Ryan is the one who noticed it? Rex Ryan, who doesn't even know he has a player on his team named Tim Teabow?

It's too bad that Rod Serling has passed away. He'd make a great National Sports Commissioner.

It seems the "Sideline Chatter" crisis has passed. I have received some information which will allow me to continue to share the pearls of wisdom from the desk of Dwight Perry.

***THEY SAID IT***
"Big news from Augusta: Tiger Woods got in trouble for an improper drop. And this time it wasn't his pants."  -- RJ Currie
"Meanwhile back in the mundane sports world Mark Sanchez gave an interview about Tim Tebow, saying “I just don’t know if it was the best situation for either of us, but you play with the cards you are dealt with and do the very best you can.” Right so Tebow made him butt-fumble?"  -- Janice Hough
"Yes, as a matter of fact, Tebow told him to turn the other cheek.”  -- Dwight Perry
"A Florida state senator is calling for an investigation of the NCAA. This is a new low for the NCAA. It's considered shady by Florida politics standards."  -- Brad Dickson
" Favorite Tiger Woods did not win the Masters. Which saved the embarrassment of Elin Nordegren's lawyers showing up at the ceremony and cutting the green jacket in half."  -- Brad Dickson


CP-





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