AROUND THE LEAGUE

***A DIFFERENT WAY TO ATTACK THE PROBLEM***
The Miami Marlins and the Toronto Blue Jays have pulled off a blockbuster trade. The Jays got SS Jose Reyes and pitchers Josh Johnson and Mark Buehrle. The Jays gave up SS Yunel Escobar, some secondary players and four pretty good prospects. Of course, the Blue Jays still don't have a manager, but one more big trade like this and they won't need one.
The Marlins are left with Giancarlo Stanton and...well, that's all. Since it's against the rules to have him bat third, fourth AND fifth at the same time, it doesn't look like they'll have much of an offense. Stanton's not too happy, either. "Alright, I'm pissed off!!! Plain & Simple," Stanton tweeted.
Owner Jeffrey Loria is supposedly changing the decor of the stadium to a number of white flags...all at half-mast.

***...AND ANOTHER THING I WANT...***
The Lakers hired Mike D'Antoni to be their new head coach, much to the chagrin of Phil Jackson. Reportedly, Jackson thought the job was his and it was just a matter of ironing out the details. Rumor has it, his price was too high -- waaay too high. "Okay, I want the final say on all personnel matters, part ownership in the team, a lounge chair on the bench, a sedan chair ride to and from the locker room,...where'd everybody go??

***THAT WAS EASY***
Mike Trout and Bryce Harper were voted Rookie Of The Year in their respective leagues, in what had to be the easiest choice since electing Babe Ruth into the Hall of Fame. I can see the new candy bar now: the Mike and Bryce. "Buy it now, because the price is going to skyrocket later."

***HE FOUND HIS FIRST 'ONE DUMB OWNER'***
Robinson Cano became an American citizen yesterday. Apparently. it's Scott Boras' first move with his new client. I wonder what the US Government had to agree to? A No-Trade clause? Player options? Incentives? 

***DO YOU THINK YOU WERE TOO HARD ON HIM?***
Andrew Marchand of ESPN, had an end-of-the-year interview with Joe Girardi. Some sample questions were, "What was your favorite team? What's your favorite food? Do you cook?"  I guess he was leaving the tough questions for Barbara Walters.

*** THEY SAID IT***
" At the Victoria Secret Fashion Show in New York, Alessandra Ambrosio wore a $2.5 million jewel-studded bra. It's the costliest bust this side of Bill's quarterback Ryan Fitzpatrick."  -- RJ Currie
"Jackson's demand for paid nap time killed Laker deal."  -- eTrueSports.com
 "AMF Bowling Worldwide Inc., the world's largest bowling-alley operator, filed for bankruptcy for the second time in 11 years, citing debts up to $500 million. Creditors, in keeping with the theme, say they'll be lucky to get a 7-10 split."  -- Dwight Perry
"The Dodgers signed ex-steroid slugger Mark McGwire as their hitting coach: "His name was on a state highway in Missouri, but at USC it's on the chemistry building."  -- Argus Hamilton
"Well, give him points for honesty: QB Tyler Bray told reporters “I’m paid to win football games.” For the initiated, Bray plays at Tennessee. Not the Titans. The University of Tennessee."  -- Janice Hough
"The Philadelphia 76ers have something called Big Bella - the world's largest T-Shirt launcher. How embarrassing is this for North Korea? We now have a T-Shirt gun with a longer range than their missle launchers."  -- Brad Dickson
"Trainers at a South Korean zoo have taught an elephant to say words which locals claim they can understand. So there's new hope for Charles Barkley."  -- RJ Currie

Just for the record, when I lift a direct quote from another source, I italicize and color it. If it's not colored, I made it up.

CP-