THREE DAYS TO GO

...until the season starts (for real). In the meantime:

***HA-HA-HA...I MEAN, REALLY? SORRY***
The "compensation" Boston got from Epstein and the Cubs apparently is a sore-armed pitcher named Chris Carpenter. This should be the final example to the Red Sox that Theo Epstein knew what he was doing. The worst part (or the best part, depending on whether or not you wear pinstripes) is that the Boston medical staff examined and approved Carpenter before the trade was official. Supposedly, the Cubs & Red Sox front offices are on friendly terms...or at least, they were.

***IT'S ONLY WRONG IF THE YANKS ARE INVOLVED***
The Red Sox and the Rays played to a 7-7 tie yesterday, with the game being 'called' after 9 innings. After the game, manager Booby Valentine, who complained bitterly when Girardi refused to play extra innings against the Sox, was heard to say...nothing. Guess it was just too difficult to find a way to blame New York.

***WELL, THAT'S ONE PROBLEM SOLVED***
There is no longer any question about which 5 pitchers are going to be in the Yanks starting rotation. Michael Pineda has been put on the DL to start the season with shoulder stiffness. He was slammed for 6 runs in 2+ innings in his last start and finally admitted that his shoulder was sore. Andy Pettitte chances just increased.

***HE'S STILL TALKING***
Ryan Braun again made a veiled reference to the "real story" behind his PED situation. Either tell us this fairy tale or just shut up. Nobody believes you. In the meantime, he hit a monster home run on Friday. And the questions remain...

***PROVIDING NEW JOBS***
With the influx of Japanese and other Asian and Spanish players, many teams have official interpreters, but Boston is going to have to go one better. With the addition of pitcher Ross Ohlendorf, who is allegedly the smartest player in the majors, Boston will be forced to hire an interpreter so Bobby Valentine will know what Ross is saying. Good luck with that one.

Do you get the idea that I don't care for Valentine? Very observant.

***IT'S DOWN TO ONE GAME***
Kansas and Kentucky won last night and will meet for the championship Monday night.
Louisville had a number of chances to beat Kentucky, but every time they got close, they would get wild and crazy and throw the ball away. Not really typical of a Pitino-coached team. Kentucky fans celebrated in a very subdued manner (for them) by burning furniture and flipping over cars. I can't wait to see what they do if Kentucky wins it all.
Kansas beat Ohio State in spite of the referees, who allowed OSU guard Aaron Craft to get in front of KU players and draw charges that weren't there. At least we're done watching him whine about every call that goes against them. Ohio St. has a well-coached team, partly I think, because their coaches don't have to worry about teaching them to dribble. Which works, by the way, when the refs don't know what walking is.

***IT'S DOWN TO THREE GAMES***
The women go at it tonight. The four #1 seeds vie for the chance to be in the final game. It sounds like it's the four best teams, but the seedings are still the result of some committee's best guess. Because it's one and done, anything could happen, but I'd like to see Connecticut against Baylor in the final game.

## 49 year-old Jamie Moyer has made the Colorado Rockies roster. Not only has he made it, he's projected as the #2 starter. All I can say is, GO FOR IT, GERITOL JAMIE!!

***THEY SAID IT***
"In Fresno, Calif., a team of amateur bicyclists training for a race was attacked by a cow. This is a clue you may not be ready for the Tour de France: You're pedaling as fast as you can and you're still caught by a cow." -- Brad Dickson
"Jeremy Lin will have knee surgery and probably miss the rest of the NBA season. He still probably spent more time on the court for the Knicks this year than most of the men playing basketball in the NCAA Final Four have spent in classes." -- Janice Hough
"What can you say about the uniforms Baylor sported during March Madness? If real bears were that colour, even Vegas wouldn't give them odds of surviving hunting season." -- RJ Currie
"Only in Japan: Security searched all fans entering the stadium to make sure they brought cameras and cell phones." -- TC Chong
"Jamie Moyer is still pitching at age 49. The scouts no longer point the radar gun at him; they just count "one-Mississippi, two-Mississippi ... " -- Jim Caple, ESPN
"The Texas Rangers concessions include a 2-foot-long chili dog covered with cheese — once again accentuating the fine line between concession food and weapons of mass destruction."
-- Brad Dickson
"Female beach volleyball players will no longer be required to wear bikinis at this years Summer Games. What do they think we watch beach volleyball for? The volleying?" -- Jimmy Kimmel

CP-