## On the other hand, Denard Span and Ron Gardenhire would just as soon not remember. Both got tossed in the 3rd inning, Span for arguing a strike call, Gardy, for just arguing. It did seem to me that umpire Greg Gibson had a pretty short fuse. But, at least it provided the over-crowded broadcast booth something to talk (and talk, and talk) about for the next inning and a half: how to argue with the ump without getting evicted. Now that I know, I'll never get thrown out.
## 49 year-old Jamie Moyer became the oldest man ever to win a baseball game. The game took only 2 hours and 48 minutes, which is surprising considering how long it took Moyer to walk from the dugout to the mound and back, using his walker.
## Not to be outdone by Texas' $26 hot dog, A Cleveland Indians affiliate, the Lake County Captains, now offer a $20 fish sandwich.
The sandwich contains 4 quarter-pound fish fillets, 8 slices of cheese, 6 ounces of clam strips, a third-pound of french fries, cole slaw, lettuce, tomatoes pickles and tartar sauce. The team says Pepto-Bismol is extra.According to the Captains, the hoagie will feed 2 fans uncomfortably, or 4 fans comfortably. They said it's also what killed Gregory Peck. It's called "The Moby Dick."
I'd sure hate to get "hooked" on this one.
## Boston got beat 18-3 last night. Starting pitcher Jon Lester was terrible, but reliever Mark Melancon was worse. Considered to be a great pickup by the Red Sox, Melancon has not performed well. In 4 appearances, a total of 2 innings, he has given up 11 runs, which is an ERA of 49.50. That's an average of 5 1/2 runs an INNING. Boston wasn't sure if they were going to use him as a starter, in long relief or short relief. It turns out to be comic relief.
In a related story, Kevin Youkilis went 0-4 with 4 strikeouts last night, and is now hitting .176. On the other hand, he did break two helmets, so he must be coming out of his slump.
## All five starters for the NCAA Champion Kentucky Wildcats, have declared for the NBA draft. I don't know how well they'll do as pros, but based on their mumbling, incoherent interviews at the press conference, all five are NBA-interview ready.
***THEY SAID IT***
"The first long-distance call from Boston to New York occurred March 27, 1884. Unofficial transcripts have the first words being, "What'll you give me for Jamie Moyer?" -- RJ Currie
"A brush fire forced a shutdown of the New Jersey Turnpike near the Jets' Met Life Stadium.
Alas, it was just Tim Tebow, standing next to a burning bush." -- Dwight Perry
"Panthers GM Dale Tallon said he hoped his players grew playoff beards all the way down to their rear ends: "OK, so anatomy isn't his strong suit." -- Ian Hamilton
Jason Gay of The Wall Street Journal, on the popularity of athletes' designer colognes: "What man doesn't want to go into a department store and come out smelling like Dirk Nowitzki midway through Game 6?"
"Congrats to Jamie Moyer on his first win of the 2012 season. The lefty thus becomes the first MLB pitcher to have a win transmitted not only on the internet, but also by Morse Code." -- Janice Hough
"YouTube has amazing video of someone making a basketball shot from a Goodyear blimp. Turns out the shot was taken by Kobe Bryant during a Lakers game, after he ignored two wide open teammates under the basket." -- Brad Dickson
CP-
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