A COUPLE OF RANTS

***DAMON CLAIMED OFF WAIVERS***
Johnny was claimed by the Red Sox yesterday. No big deal, it seems everybody gets put on waivers and sometimes players are claimed, but it's all a game: who's interested in this guy, who's not, who needs help, who's blocking another team, etc. General managers need to do something to fill up their day.
Damon's reaction was typical: "I'm a Detroit Tiger. I like being a Tiger. They want me here. I don't want to go anywhere. I hope to be here next year." etc. - etc. - etc. However, here's a scenario that could very well happen:
Theo Epstein (Red Sox GM), "Johnny, we'll give you a $5 million bonus if you'll..."
Damon: "I'M YOURS!"
Think it can't happen? Watch.

***AN EMOTION-FILLED GAME***
Here's a rant from the 'Connecticut Yankee':
"Chad,
I had to say something about this. The plate umpire last night, Jerry Meals, sucked with a suckitude that would have impressed a lamprey. Not only was his strike zone all over the place (instead of "Be inside or be outside, but be consistent!" running through his head, he had the theme of "The Andy Griffith Show"), he made up for his inconsistency by being contentious. Why did he chase Encarnacion off the field, then toss him? Did the Jays shortstop send him telepathic cuss words that Meals picked up with his ESP? Hello? Mr. Meals? This is actually a baseball game, not The Jerry Meals Show. Umps should be heard and not seen. They're there to reduce conflicts during the game, not create them.

By the way, what was the deal with the over-sensitive Bautista stalking toward Ivan Nova with a bat in his hand when the pitch got away from the Yankee rookie? Honestly, talk about a persecution complex. Here's the pitcher, just called up from AAA for his first start, facing the pressure of playing for the Yankees against a strong team like the Jays, trying his best to throw strikes and actually pitching pretty well. Despite his efforts, at least two pitches per inning got away from him. Now here's bad-ass, juiced-up (Did I just say that?) Mr. "I've never hit more than 16 HRs in a season, but now that I'm pushing 40, I'm all that and a bowl of sherbet" Bautista who's crowding the plate. Another ball gets away from Nova, sailing over Cervelli's head--NOT Bautista's--and the Jays batter gets ornery. Some advice: Get over yourself, grab some Xanax bubble gum, and step back into the box, Yosemite Sam.

Speaking of sucking, Jeter had the night off. Not to worry: Teixeira and Nunez picked up the GIDP slack.

That's all for me, folks. I am outta here."

Couldn't have said it better myself, CY.

CP-