...AND A COUPLE OF LAUGHS

***NOMAR RETIRES AS A RED SOX***
I don't understand Boston's thinking on this. Boston signed him to a one-day contract so he could retire as a member of the Red Sox. Garciaparra was a very good hitter and a decent fielder with an unfortunate tendency to make errors in crucial situations. However, Picasner's lasting memory of Nomar, is him sitting (pouting, really) on the bench in that stirring 14-inning game against the Yanks, when everyone (well, ALMOST everyone) on both sides played their hearts out. Even if he was hurt and couldn't play, he still remained on the bench when everyone else stood on the top step, hovering on the railing. Why would you want to honor that?

***ANOTHER ROUND OF TEAM NICKNAMES***
Sometimes they make sense, like the UCONN Huskies (Yukon!), sometimes you have to wonder. You might not see all of the following teams in the NCAA Tournament, but this should help you remember their nicknames if you do:

Coastal Carolina Chanticleers - How many of you really know what a Chanticleer is?
Georgetown Hoyas - Same here. Maybe this is why they don't have a team mascot.
Sam Houston State Bearkats - Apparently, remedial spelling is not taught here.
Wichita State Shockers - I could have understood Oilers or Drillers but what are they shocked about?
Saint Mary's Gaels - Is this a religious term? Another misspelling? A monk with a sense of humor?
Wake Forest Demon Deacons - Good witch-bad witch?
Question: If the Fighting Irish played the Fighting Illini, would they really need a basketball?

***FROM KEVIN GLEASON ***
He writes for the Middletown Times Herald-Record, who's front page probably consists only of their name: "John Calipari of Kentucky twittered: 'An old African proverb states: If you want to go fast, go alone. If you want to go far, go together.'
Kevin responded, He forgot the last part: 'And if you want to go on probation, go to Kentucky."

***BETTER RETHINK THIS***
Adrian Beltre, Red Sox third baseman, told the Boston Globe that he still refuses to wear a protective cup despite a bad-hop grounder that allowed him to sing soprano for about 2 weeks last year. "If the ball's only going to hit me there every 11 years, I'll take my chances."
You should probably review that policy, Adrian. Major League hitters are known for finding and exploiting a defensive "soft spot."

***VERY BAD TIMING***
ESPN's latest commercial showing coach Jim Calhoun of Connecticut, giving a pep talk to some ESPN announcers, might have been more effective if the Connecticut team was any good. Probably should have used Geno Auriemma, the women's coach.

***SYRACUSE-GEORGETOWN AT NOON TODAY ON ESPN***

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